SAKITNYE!!

X tau nape ak sedih, hati sakit.. rase nk nangis... Ak kalo tulis memanjang sakit, nk nangis.. tp tu yg ak rasa skang ni.. ak betul2 riso dengan tajuk yg ak akan kene buat nnt.. die mcm senang tp ak rase susaaah sgt.. betapa ak bencikan kebodohan ak skarang..
Masa yg sama i miss him.. maybe sbb lame x jumpe.. die slalu ngan membe die.. that part ak x kisah.. the thing is die dh x mesej ak mcm dulu.. gelak2 ngan ak.. maybe its my own fault.. ak start dulu.. post bende mcm tu, stat tu dh x mesej.. n die slalu mesej org laen, bukan aku.. yela ak x sekelas ngan die sume.. buat ap nk mesej ak, kuar ngan ak sume.. baik ngan budak kelas die.. walau perit, ak akan cube simpan n kawal perasaan ak.. ak akan lupekan die, thn diri dr tegur die.. unless necessary.. tp ak rindukan die.. ak sometimes mesej die tp balas mcm x nk balas.. kalo die mesej ak pon, die bukan mmg niat mesej ak.. die mesej sbb ade org laen.. i hate being used... Benciii.. tu yg perit, sakit.. i hate myself for letting me myself fall again.. ak x tau nk watpe.. ak sygkn die.. tp x mungkin die tau n sedar perasaan ak ni.. ak pendam perasaan ak n it hurt.. i miss all that memory.. tp yela, die dh jd memori.. kuatkanlah ak ya allah.. atau kau cabutknlah nyawa ak, agar ak x sshkn sesape dan selagi die x mmbenciku.. kerana ak x nk hilang kawan..

Today is my day!~

Today im going to treat myself.. im going to make myself happy today coz ive been down lately especially yesterday n even today i feel quite sad.. but i want to forget eeeverything n enjoy myself... Izaaa be happy today just today forget bouy everything.. gambattee!! ;)

다시..

Im tearing up again.. im a type of person who easily misdunderstand when a guy treat me well.. but since im a tough in my attitude, i try to take it easy.. i try not to think in differ way.. i really hope i can run away from this kind of feeling coz i dont want to cry again.. and again.. be strong izaa...

wae nae ma eum mi apahanda~

Hati ak ni terlmpau sakit smpai air mataku bergenang.. sakit bukan marah or anything, tp ak sedih.. sakit sbb ak risaukan die.. risaukan mrk n rindukan mereka to be exact.. ak ade crush ke? Me myself not sure.. 1 thing i do know rite now, hati ak sedih sgt.. is it ak trlmpau lembut hati or ak mmg sukekan diorg.. if i do, which one?? I really hope the best thing happen to them.. even if im not part of it but i want them to be happy ans healthy always~ if they hurt, i'm hurt to.. be strong guys.. coz i will always try to be there for u whenever u need me to even though im not important for u anymore.. i will always try to make u smile even im hurt inside.. always.. iza, be strong!

Why do i have to live...

I do wish that i die right now.. i dont want to give a hard time to other people around me.. i dont want my living cause them trouble especially for ma fam and fren.. why do i always them a hard time.. im not worth living.. hidup slalu susahkan org.. even i hate myself inikan pulak org laen.. ak x nk hidup sshkan org.. membazir, x reti nk gune otak.. i know that people around me think that im annoying. Though some people are nice n close to but i know the fed up with me.. YaAllah.. selalu ak mohon andai hidupku hanya menyusahkan ibu bapaku tlg lah cabut nyawaku.. ak x nk susahkan diorg.. hanya Kau tau ape yg akan berlaku, apa yg terbaik untukku. Aku ikhlaskan semuanya..

My Dream that I wish will come true~ -_- zzZZ

last 2 night if i'm not mistaken, i've been dreaming about one of a group member that i like~ this member has been rest from their group activities coz want to continue his studies. if i'm not mistaken he went somewhere in US. curious?? hehe that guy is AJ, from UKISS. yes i'm a KISSME.. and also a VIP, CASSIE, HOTTEST, BABY and etc.. it will be a lot if i want to mentioned it here~ anyway, i've been dreaming about him. he spending his time with like he is one of my friend~ we and some of my other friend went holiday together in one of my favourite holiday vacation spot.. i think.. we've been driving around, visiting places, town, etc.. even there's some twist going around, it is a great dream. i even still remember most part of the dream when i wake up. i feel like i don't want to wake up from my sleep, wake up from my dream. i want to live in my dream. it tensionless, feel of happiness.. i don't want to live in my reality that is suck!~ anyway, i really miss him so much i  guess.. i remember that day, i've been thinking about him u know, missing to seeing him rap, dance smile etc~ rite now his twitter that connect him and his fan.. and also u-kiss old vid when he was still active. i heard that this FEB he will be joining u-kiss activity~ i dont know whether it's for a while of for a long time. whatever it is i really miss him.. if not why did i dream of him instead of all of my other friend~

i also did dream about 2 artist before.. it happened around 2 year ago.. i don't really remember the detail, but i remember me, doo jun oppa and jun hyung oppa in a van to go somewhere~ i also remember how hard i want to communicate with them since i dont know any korean.. it's weird when i dream about artist.. especially korean artist~ i wonder why..? as far as i remember i never dream about my country artist~ well, the important thing is, i like what i dream so far, and i hope that i can live in my dream 4eva!~

still hope and wonder~ AKTF

i just finished  watched SMTOWN 2012 in tokyo and seoul~ i luv their performance, but i miss DBSK.. the older DBSK. i know it is impossible to see them together back but i kindda miss them together perform~ together with their family~ SM family.. now their lawsuit has finished i hope i can see more of JYJ.. seing yunho and changmin have fun with their family i wonder did they ever miss them? coz i do~ i really do.. watching yunho and changmin perform rising sun and somebody to luv make me sad coz i used to hear yoochun, jaejoong, and junsu voice in that song.. but now just the two of them singing and try to fill the empty in the song~ they seem happy, but i dont really satisfied with that~ coz from what i know, that song are supposed to be sang by 5 people, not two~

 anyway, i hope the best of them~ five of them~

AKTF